Got home about 10 tonight. It was tiring. All those assignments were a test of patience and language. I wish I could do better. I wish my language is somewhat more impressing. Sighs. I have been staying focus on the task that is ahead of me, while trying to identify which matters are more significant to me right now. I am glad I did not break down and went awry during these times. It was not easy, having to juggle tons of thoughts that appeared in the same time. Going for a jog will definitely help lessen the burden off the shoulder, but was that the best solution that one should think of? I've tried practicing meditations, but half way through, those thoughts just blundered in. I am sick of this feeling inside me. I just want to empty everything that's in my mind. Some believe that it's easy. Snap your fingers and it's gone. Does this makes me a loser that can't seem to face the fact? Or does it makes me a stronger person mentally? I need to take a break and find my track again. I really have to let go those thoughts and feelings before I crash one fine day.
I keep thinking that I'm doing just fine. But when things appeared and proved me wrong, the feelings haunted my thoughts again. I am so lost. All I could do is just to pray for wisdom and strength.
When will these thoughts go away?
Friday, November 7, 2008
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Day 5: I missed Day 4.
Went to a waterfall in Cheras with my close uni friends at about 11 something yesterday. It's called "Air Terjun Sg. Gabai". Sounds more like "Air Terjun Sg. C**bai".. Haha.. That was the joke for the day. Anyways, the place looks calm..but the steepy steps to go up to the peak of the waterfall was not an easy task. It took us about 15-20 minutes to finally reach up there. The first thing we did was to set up everything. Placing newspapers and unpacking the food we bought earlier.. All of us were extremely hungry.. Finished the food and was having my after-meal ciggy.
Out of the blue, Melon said she needed my lighter.. Guess what. The 5 of them bought 6 different slices of Secret Recipe cakes to celebrate my birthday. I was overwhelmed. I didn't thought they would actually set up this plan. Furthermore, it's the first time in my life I've celebrated it in this kind of environment. The waterfall area is really cooling and breezy. Nothing bothers you. Everything was as calm as ever. Sang the birthday song and made wishes. These friends will definitely make you remember them. Their thoughtfulness is just something that you cannot deny. They are great. Though at times, conflicting opinion may arise between all of us. But at the end of the day, things were better off as we understand each other more.
Halfway through our picnic, it started to drizzle. What the.... We were just about to enjoy ourselves in the water when it suddenly rained. Really "potong stim".. Hehe.. Anyways, it only rained for about 15 minutes or so.. But it was about time to go off.. Miao Miao will be having her quiz at 1600. Rushed down the sloping pathways. As we reached the end of the waterfall, they decided to play for a while more. Took some pictures, and all of a sudden, they started splashing water on me. Being the least wet person (minus our camera girl), they kept splashing until I was wet. Obviously I ran (in the water) and worst, I fell. Blood oozing from my knee cap with lots of scratches. Not to mention about Melon's lenses. It came out and torn. Wonder how that happen.
Anyways, we change and drive back to uni. WC was speeding all the way, afraid that Miao Miao will be late for her quiz. Reach back just in time. Went to HL's place to shower and everything. By then, it was already 1730 pm.. Feeling so damn exhauted and hungry, all 5 of us went to the nearby mamak for our dinner. Chatted for awhile n it is time to attend our tutorial scheduled at 1830. Make a quick move and reach our class before it starts.
Though it was tiring, I'm sure all of us enjoyed the picnic. This is one of the birthdays that I'll always remember. Thank you all so much.
p/s: We took lots of pictures, but haven't receive it from Miao Miao.. Will post it up some other time.
Out of the blue, Melon said she needed my lighter.. Guess what. The 5 of them bought 6 different slices of Secret Recipe cakes to celebrate my birthday. I was overwhelmed. I didn't thought they would actually set up this plan. Furthermore, it's the first time in my life I've celebrated it in this kind of environment. The waterfall area is really cooling and breezy. Nothing bothers you. Everything was as calm as ever. Sang the birthday song and made wishes. These friends will definitely make you remember them. Their thoughtfulness is just something that you cannot deny. They are great. Though at times, conflicting opinion may arise between all of us. But at the end of the day, things were better off as we understand each other more.
Halfway through our picnic, it started to drizzle. What the.... We were just about to enjoy ourselves in the water when it suddenly rained. Really "potong stim".. Hehe.. Anyways, it only rained for about 15 minutes or so.. But it was about time to go off.. Miao Miao will be having her quiz at 1600. Rushed down the sloping pathways. As we reached the end of the waterfall, they decided to play for a while more. Took some pictures, and all of a sudden, they started splashing water on me. Being the least wet person (minus our camera girl), they kept splashing until I was wet. Obviously I ran (in the water) and worst, I fell. Blood oozing from my knee cap with lots of scratches. Not to mention about Melon's lenses. It came out and torn. Wonder how that happen.
Anyways, we change and drive back to uni. WC was speeding all the way, afraid that Miao Miao will be late for her quiz. Reach back just in time. Went to HL's place to shower and everything. By then, it was already 1730 pm.. Feeling so damn exhauted and hungry, all 5 of us went to the nearby mamak for our dinner. Chatted for awhile n it is time to attend our tutorial scheduled at 1830. Make a quick move and reach our class before it starts.
Though it was tiring, I'm sure all of us enjoyed the picnic. This is one of the birthdays that I'll always remember. Thank you all so much.
p/s: We took lots of pictures, but haven't receive it from Miao Miao.. Will post it up some other time.
Sunday, October 19, 2008
Day 3: 4.08 a.m.
Just got back home from drinks with my close friends back in Kajang. I guess this time is the longest we've ever had. From 10.30 p.m. till almost 4 a.m. As usual, we discussed a lot of issues comprising from work-related issues to our personal lives. It was a good chat. Something we always share with one another as time allows us. Today's chat has bought new insights to what I will be doing in the next 4 months.
WORKING LIFE.
When I was younger (probably about 12 years old), I often dream of becoming a boss. Opening my own café, serving customers good food and a great place for relaxation. The important thing about this café of mine is it's atmosphere. Whenever patrons come in to this café, they would be feeling awe with its interior design. The café must definitely have a pool table... really cozy couches and a place where the customers will have a "classy" feel. However, as time goes by, other profession seemed to catch my attention as well. Not to mentioned my thoughts of becoming a chef. A great chef.. Someone like Gordon Ramsay.. Well, minus the f***ing trademark of his. It would be even better if I could be the owner and the head chef of this little café. The perfect plan for a food-hunter like myself.
But.... in order for me to pursue this plan, first and foremost is the capital needed for the pumping of this brilliant plan. Next, the KSAs (Knowledge, skills and ability) needed in order for the operations to go smoothly. A good marketing plan is needed as well.. Budgeting and all the other 5 other functional areas are also important for the survival and growth of this café. The monitoring and the HR functions will play an important role to this plan. Without good employees and a great management team, it is impossible for the company to grow into greater heights.
This plan was first initiated by myself and another friend of mine. This vision we have has been long implanted in our minds for almost about 10 years. There is no point for us to keep dreaming without making initiatives towards this plan. Walk the Talk, dude.. This phrase is definitely what I look into everyday. There is no point when we only know how to talk, but no actions done. The more we talk without any actions done, the idealistic mindset will soon take over the actual reality around us. I have been talking and talking about how successful should a person be in the future, driving nice cars, dining in "poshy" places and the list goes on... But when we finally look back, all we did was just doing the talk. Nothing else. However, I sincerely feel that the time is not up yet. We could only dream big for now.. And we will not know what lies ahead of our lives. Who knows maybe this little ambition of ours turns out the way we have always dreamt of.
Nobody knows.
WORKING LIFE.
When I was younger (probably about 12 years old), I often dream of becoming a boss. Opening my own café, serving customers good food and a great place for relaxation. The important thing about this café of mine is it's atmosphere. Whenever patrons come in to this café, they would be feeling awe with its interior design. The café must definitely have a pool table... really cozy couches and a place where the customers will have a "classy" feel. However, as time goes by, other profession seemed to catch my attention as well. Not to mentioned my thoughts of becoming a chef. A great chef.. Someone like Gordon Ramsay.. Well, minus the f***ing trademark of his. It would be even better if I could be the owner and the head chef of this little café. The perfect plan for a food-hunter like myself.
But.... in order for me to pursue this plan, first and foremost is the capital needed for the pumping of this brilliant plan. Next, the KSAs (Knowledge, skills and ability) needed in order for the operations to go smoothly. A good marketing plan is needed as well.. Budgeting and all the other 5 other functional areas are also important for the survival and growth of this café. The monitoring and the HR functions will play an important role to this plan. Without good employees and a great management team, it is impossible for the company to grow into greater heights.
This plan was first initiated by myself and another friend of mine. This vision we have has been long implanted in our minds for almost about 10 years. There is no point for us to keep dreaming without making initiatives towards this plan. Walk the Talk, dude.. This phrase is definitely what I look into everyday. There is no point when we only know how to talk, but no actions done. The more we talk without any actions done, the idealistic mindset will soon take over the actual reality around us. I have been talking and talking about how successful should a person be in the future, driving nice cars, dining in "poshy" places and the list goes on... But when we finally look back, all we did was just doing the talk. Nothing else. However, I sincerely feel that the time is not up yet. We could only dream big for now.. And we will not know what lies ahead of our lives. Who knows maybe this little ambition of ours turns out the way we have always dreamt of.
Nobody knows.
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